Shrapnel
Shrapnel
"Let's face it. We're undone by each other. And if we're not, we're missing something. If this seems so clearly the case with grief, it is only because it was already the case with desire. One does not always stay intact."
-Judith Butler
Put another way—
“People say friends don’t destroy one another / What do they know about friends?”
-The Mountain Goats (Game Shows Touch Our Lives / Tallahassee)
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I've always found the word internecine thought-provoking. It gets defined a number of ways; one version is "mutual destruction on both sides."